I accepted Christ as the Savior of my life at a very young age. I remember sitting in church on a Sunday night (I believe I was in the 3rd grade) and feeling the Holy Spirit work in me in a way that I knew I needed to accept Christ in my life. I was quite a shy little girl and walking the aisle to the pastor at the end of the service was a big deal. Because of my age, and something that I now appreciate more than I can explain, the pastor wanted to meet with me along with my parents after the service to make sure I understood what I was doing. That night in his office along with my parents, I accepted Jesus into my heart. I accepted Him as my Savior and believed that He came into the world in order to die on the cross to save me from my sins being the ultimate sacrifice. I confessed to Him that I am a sinner and that I needed Him. From that moment on I have tried to obey God in every aspect of my life. When I say that I have tried, that doesn't always mean that I have succeeded. I have fallen short A LOT! But the great thing is that God is there to help me back up when I fall and He is there to forgive me when I need it.
Now that I am a mom I am starting to realize the importance of letting God's light shine through me. I want my boys to grow up in a way that they see God through me. We have been teaching Logan to pray. We have been praying with him at meals and then also before he goes to bed. His meal prayer was "Thank you Jesus food Amen," which was great. Now, however, he is learning to pray for others. During meal time prayers and even at night he will pray for Dustin, Luke, me and himself and anyone else he can see and he ends by saying, "in Jesus name, Amen." Now I know that he is only 3 (as of next Tuesday!) but I want to instill in him all of the Christian values that my parents instilled in Scott and I growing up. I want them to grow up knowing that their parents are devout Christians who live their lives the best they can in a way that is pleasing to God. My prayer is that both of my boys come to know and accept Christ into their lives at an early age and that the grow to be strong men of God.
I say all of this (yes, I can talk a lot or type a lot!) because God is showing me areas of my life that need work and need work right away. Logan is so attentive and is like a sponge taking everything in. There are areas of my life that I don't want my boys to take after me. One big area is my issues with fear. I am a worrier. I can look back in my life and see along the way where worry has crept in and it has gotten worse and worse over the years. This is not something I am proud of and am currently working on getting better in this area. I worry about everything and if their is nothing to worry about, I worry about what is coming next. This is not healthy and I am completely aware of it. The Bible specifically tells us that fear and worry is not from God. In fact, we are supposed to give or fears and worries over to God and leave them there. I can give them over, but not taking them back is the issue.
God is teaching me that it is more than just asking for forgiveness for my worries, which are sins. He is teaching me that He wants a personal relationship with me that involves spending time in prayer and bible study with him. While I ask God to take away the fear and worry, it doesn't mean that He will do that immediately. I read in a book just the other day that during the time when we ask God for help and the time that our prayers are answered, is the time when He wants to develop a better relationship with us. He wants us to draw near to Him. He wants us to really trust Him and make Him the center of our lives. I truly believe that when I get to the point in my life where I have that deeper relationship with God, my fears and worries will be a thing of the past. I am happy to say that I am better than I was 6 weeks ago but I still have a long way to go. I may always have to be on guard with my fears and worries. It is so easy to fall back into our "pit" of whatever we are struggling with. They key is to get out and stay out of the "pit."
What kind of "pit" are you dealing with? What is God trying to teach you? If you are serious about dealing with your "pit" then I encourage you to get the book " Get Out of That Pit," by Beth Moore. It will be well worth it.
Thanks for listening to me and let me know if you are struggling too. Maybe we can become accountability partners and work together through our issues. I have found that it is alway comforting to know that other people are dealing with some of the same issues that you are. It isn't so lonely when you have a friend to lean on. Let me be that friend.
Hebrews 4:16 "Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." NIV